Day 6: Single and Happy
30 Days Writing Challenge
I was single for the first 23 years of my life, and though I always wanted to be in a relationship, it was never a need. I was single and happy most of the time.
I had time for myself, in which I could do anything! Be it playing video games, reading books, or just binge-watching series, it was my time.
And sometimes when I used to look at my friends shouting at their partners and going through such drama, it felt like something that I'm not meant to do. Being a world-class people pleaser and someone with a self-worth of nothing, I didn't think I would be able to handle such emotional rollercoasters of a relationship.
And then it all started, due to my naivety and some toxic friends, I got into a relationship. Things happened, and I fell out of love because a lot was changing and I was losing myself due to all the little arguments and possessiveness issues.
What followed was 2.5 years of on-and-off severe depression and crippling anxiety. That’s a separate story…
Point is, it made me the person I am today, and I fucking love this person. I am aware of all my issues(or at least I think I do) and am working on them. I have no clue whether I am ready to be in a relationship or not, it makes me anxious even thinking about it due to past issues.
Plus here in the UK, I am so busy all the time, I doubt if I’ll be able to sustain one.
But I’m much more aware of myself now, and if I happen to really connect with someone, who knows what it might end into!
The Curious Overthinker
Sarthak Mirchandani
